Releasing fears

We all have some. Everyone deals with their sets of insecurities and psychological obstacles that hinders their growth. However, even though we know they are there, a lot of us pretend like they are not. And so, these fears, these elements of our lives that are slowing us down and stopping us from achieving our pure potential, are instead buried away, deep down inside.

The good news is we can all be free of them! Whether we believe in certain support systems, healing energy, or not, it is all in there somewhere. WE are the one we have been waiting for. WE all have the power to heal ourselves, to find these hiding places and to release these locked up fears and emotions.

What is important to understand is that everyone is different so we all heal differently. Some people do not need guidance, support or help, but others do. This does not mean however that some are stronger or weaker than others. We simply react and store those stimuli differently and so this is why there are various methods to guide us in releasing these.

And so, which ever way you function, take a moment to acknowledge the barriers that are preventing you to live a fuller life. Do not focus on material goods as they only divert your attention to non-essential things. Instead, see how you could be a better person to yourself and your loved ones. And finally, understand that you hold the key, you ARE the key. So breathe, and let go.

Namaste.

Embracing change

Many of us have been told: “you’ve changed a lot” or “you’re not the same person anymore”. Whether said with good intentions or not, the fact is, change is constantly happening around us and within us. To paraphrase Daviji, you are not the same person that you were when you woke up this morning, and by the time you finish reading this article, you will not be the same person that you are now.

On a physical and molecular level, our bodies are in a constant state of change and adaptation. New blood cells are generated, old tissues are being shed, we’ve taken one more breath and heard another sound. On psychological and neurological level, our brain is continuously making new neural connections, registering new information, while we continue to learn and seek to understand.

So why are people so afraid of change? You don’t believe me?! Think about those who have pointed out how much you have changed; why do you think that they are telling you this? You are disrupting their way of being, their status quo. Your relationship with them will never be the same. This change will affect them too. But it doesn’t have to be a bad thing, it simply is. As my teacher once said: “you will never experience this moment this same way ever again” ~ Guy Tardif.

Some people hold on to “the way things were” for far too long, expecting things and people to remain the same. Some people may even feel threatened or blame others for the change they are noticing in you. The reality is that they no longer feel important to you. When a person defines himself or herself externally, meaning in relation to others, they become a victim feeling as though they owed or that you have betrayed them…

Then, sometimes, you will find people who will support you through this change. Some may even push you outside of your comfort zone and, although you may not like this very much at first, these are the situations that, should you choose to let them, will change you for ever. And once you will accept to look within you and to face these fears, these past events and people who are preventing you to grow, always bringing you back to face the same situation, only then will you recognize and understand how much they have helped you.

And so, to those who accuse you of having changed, answer them: “yes, I have, and it feels really good”. And to those who have been supporting and encouraging this change within me, I am forever grateful for your presence in my life and I love you muchly. Om Shanti.

Where do I fit in?

A question that a lot of us have asked ourselves at least once if not many times in our life. For some of us, we are still trying to find the right place, the right people, the right job even. This is one of the hardest question to answer because it is in constant evolution as we change and as the world moves around us. However, it is normal to ask yourself this question and in fact it is healthy because it shows that you are aware or want to become more aware of where you are…

Here are a few thoughts hoping that it will make it easier for those of you who are going through such a process these days. Firstly, I am tempted to ask you why? Why are you asking yourself this question? How do you feel about where you are now? That is to say, what is the driver behind the question?

By identifying your emotional state when you are facing such questions, you become more aware of the minds’ construct. Emotions can blind you in the choices and changes you are seeking to make. I am not saying that you should not feel anything, simply that you should be aware of how your feelings come into play. In his book Oneness With All Life, Eckhart Tolle writes: “Facing facts is always empowering. Be aware that what you think, to a large extent, creates emotions that you feel. See the link between your thinking and your emotions. Rather than being your thoughts and emotions, be the awareness behind them.”

Secondly, ask yourself what it is you are seeking; understand that you cannot do everything at the same time and accept that change may take a long time to set in. Allow yourself to take the space and time you need to reflect. Let thoughts come to you, acknowledging them but not forcing yourself to make a decision. The “what” or “where” you need to be will surface from your thought process by itself; give it time, give yourself a chance.

Finally, realize that wherever you need to be and whatever you need to do, you are doing it right now. Forcing yourself to be someone else is the same as pushing a square peg into a round opening. Be confident in what life brings you and be open to what it teaches you. Be satisfied and accept yourself as you are because you are right where you should be. Be happy.

Going back…

In less than two months I will be going back to a place I thought I had left for good. When I left, I felt I really needed to leave because the pressure and the negativity had changed me, or at least I think it did.

A few weeks ago I was still hoping that I wouldn’t have to face the same situation and then it occurred to me: no, it is fine. I have been saying that I have changed and that this year has truly been an opportunity for personal growth and introspection, so why not demonstrate it? And so, instead of being worried and disappointed I decided to see this as a chance to commit to the changes I have started to make in my life. What better way to confirm who I am becoming than by being faced with the same situation?! It will be a test for sure, but thinking of it as a personal challenge, rather than a dead-end situation, already makes me feel more at ease.

Acceptance is the first step, as I wrote previously. In his artful book entitled “Oneness With All Life”, celebrated author Eckhart Tolle tells us that: “whatever you cannot enjoy doing, you can at least accept that this is what you have to do. Acceptance means: for now, this is what this situation, this moment requires me to do, and so I do it willingly.” To become aware and ultimately happy, Tolle writes that we have to choose between three states: acceptance, for the more arduous tasks in our life, enjoyment for the things we have and should be more attentive too, and enthusiasm for the everyday gift of life and beauty that surrounds us. Recognizing these situations and choosing how to respond and perceive them is the effort that will lead to happiness.

Enthusiasm in life, even in the most boring to the most arduous tasks, from going to the grocery store to working in a difficult environment, has the power to completely change the way we experience life. If we wake-up on Monday morning already dreading the work week ahead of us, of course it will seem much harder! On the other hand if we take the approach proposed by Tolle and we choose to simply accept what is, the day will go by much quicker. When everything is a chore, when you decide to be annoyed by your co-workers and bad drivers, you will only make yourself less happy.

And so, I make this promise to myself: I will go back to this place and I will face the same situation but I will choose to accept and maybe even enjoy it. I will grow and learn from myself and others rather then disengage. I will be enthusiastic because in the end I love the work that I do and I find it important. And finally, I will choose to focus my energy on the parts of my work that I enjoy most and brush aside the other things that don’t really matter in the end. It will be a challenge and I know it will not be easy but this is not a chore, this is an opportunity to grow and learn. Peace.